Valentines Day comes along and you are reminded how single you are. Flowers and chocolates appear at the office and for a milli second of time you think maybe they’re for me. Although you are single and as of late there hasn’t been any advances from any potential prospects, you still live in hope. Then you find they are for your colleague and you heart sinks a little. Are you finding being single a burden? Then this blog is for you.
I wrote this post because a friend of mine just couldn’t be happy until they found a partner and they really struggled. A significant birthday was approaching and hey had never had a serious relationship so they began to loose their happiness in life. So I had a chat with them and highlighted that there were so many great things they had to enjoy right now in life. There is nothing wrong in being single. People sometimes lose hope due to their relationship status. The pressure to get married and have children is ever present in society as if that was what life was all about. But its not, life is not about being married. Maybe you had a relationship fail, you’re not 21 anymore so you think “will I ever meet somebody?” or “am I destined to be alone?”.
However what if being happy right where you are in life, without relationship status being an issue? Well lets talk a little about the joys of being single.
Marriage is a choice not a requirement
The fact is marriage is not a requisite in life. Its a simple choice. Maybe its in your plan or maybe its not, but either way its a choice. Now I understand it takes two to agree to choose this route in life, for marriage is the union or two people. But its still a choice and its not something you ever have to choose. So if somebody gets all Q&A on you with questions like “so any sign of a ring on the finger yet?”, the simple answer is “it will happen when it happens”.
Single does not mean lonely
Why do many of us associate being single with being lonely? I have known married couples with one of the spouses suffering from being lonely. A spouse whom sleeps and eats with their partner every day and feeling lonely? So if you feel lonely, marriage doesn’t change that. For we must ask why we feel lonely. I find that the real reason people feel lonely is they don’t have anybody to be open and honest with. They put up walls and nobody ever gets inside and so the walls can make you feel lonely even surrounded by people.
Embrace the freedom
You’re single, meaning you are less tied down with responsibilities so now is the time in your life to see the world, join clubs and new social circles. Get out there and enjoy the world. Enjoy the freedom you have. One day you may be married and have kids, and at that stage travel and those things maybe more difficult to orchestrate.
Invest in yourself
Now is a great time for you to invest in yourself. From further education to learning new skills. What about writing, music, cooking, or even learning how to dance. Take up a motor sport or pursue your interests in other sports. What ever you want to do, you can do it without having to do too much planning or needing to consult with a spouse, which is an element of freedom only a single person can have, so embrace it.
Yes treat yourself. If you can afford to buy yourself a treat, then you can. When you are more settled down, married, etc. its not as easy to buy yourself treats. Now don’t get me wrong its not that you can’t when you are married, but when you are married you must consider your partner and other financial priorities before you splurge. So treating yourself when you are single is a lot simpler so enjoy this liberty.
Live your life
I know its a short simple line “live your life”, but it means a lot. It means live your life and enjoy it. Don’t let what you don’t have ever have a hold over you, for in life there are lots of things we may want but not have. So lets focus on what we have, rather than what we don’t have.
Hope this helps you and feel free to share this blog with anyone whom it might help. Don’t forget to subscribe to my free newsletter to keep up to date with my latest blogs HERE
By Mark Fennell